TYPES OF ICQ USERS

* SHY ICQ USER
When you ask them: "Have you been connected all day?" They reply: "No! I just came in to check my E-mail!"

* VIOLENT ICQ USER
When you ask them: "Have you been connected all day?" They reply: "Go to hell your son-of-a-bitch!"

* HYPOCRITE ICQ USER
When you ask them: "Have you been connected all day?" They reply: "This is his brother, do you want to leave a message?"

* ICQ USER IN LOVE
When you ask them: "Have you been connected all day?" They reply: "I'm in a chat with my baby! bye!"

* BUSY ICQ USER
When you ask them: "Have you been connected all day?" They reply: " ;-) "

* ICQ USER WITH BAD MANNERS
When you ask them: "Have you been connected all day?" They don't reply!

* SINCERE ICQ USER
When you ask them: "Have you been connected all day?" They reply: "I have been here since last night! I want to break the record."

* STUPID ICQ USER
When you ask them: "Have you been connected all day?" They reply: A BUNCH OF STUPIDITIES!

* GAY ICQ USER
When you ask them: "Have you been connected all day?" They reply: " ;-****** "

* RUDE ICQ USER
When you ask them: "Have you been connected all day?" They reply:

            /"\
           |\./|
           |   |     
           |   |    
           |>*<|    
           |   |     
        /'\|   |/'\
    /'\|   |   |   |
   |   %%%%%   |   |\
   |   |   |   |   |  \   <UP YOURS> 
   | *   *   *   * |>  >
   |                  /
    |               /
     |            /
      \          |
       |--/'''\--|
       | |--+= | |
       |--\.../--|

* DISTRACTED ICQ USER
When you ask them: "Have you been connected all day?" They reply: "I'm fine and you?"

* HOSTILE ICQ USER
When you ask them: "Have you been connected all day?" They put you on "DND" OR "AWAY TO USER."

* PUSILLANIMOUS ICQ USER
When you ask them: "Have you been connected all day?" They disconnect themselves.

* SOCIAL ICQ USER
When you ask them: "Have you been connected all day?" They send you a "CHAT REQUEST."

* HORNY ICQ USER
When you ask them: "Have you been connected all day?" They reply: "Sorry for being so slow to answer, the reason is that when I see you ONLINE I start typing with just one hand."

* OLYMPIAN ICQ USER
When you ask them: "Have you been connected all day?" They reply: "I havr been almhst 36 houns herg!" (Grammar mistakes are due to his long period chatting)

* PROFESSIONAL ICQ USER
When you ask them: "Have you been connected all day?" They reply: "I have been here almost two days! Let me change my diaper before we start."

* VIAGRA INFLUENCED ICQ USER
When you ask them: "Have you been connected all day?" They reply: "Do you wanna get laid?"

* LIAR ICQ USER
When you ask them: "Have you been connected all day?" They reply: "No! I just came from the beach!"

* NEWBEE ICQ USER
When you ask them: "Have you been connected all day?" They reply: "Hey! If someone wants to send you a file called "penpals" or "Good days", don't take it! IT'S A VIRUS!